Can you identify the country based on its terrorist alert terms?

By now everyone in the U.S. should be familiar with our “National Threat Advisory” system, which ranks the likelihood of terrorist attacks in a rainbow of colors from green (low risk) to red (severe risk). If you’re interested, the U.S. is currently at yellow–an elevated risk of terrorist attack.

Today, I received what I thought was a rather funny e-mail from my uncle (who sends vast amounts of humorous spam). Below is a slightly modified version (so I don’t catch hell from my company for not being PC) of that e-mail that invites you to suggest which alert type belongs to which country.

If you have other suggestions for the list, feel free to put them in the comments section below. You never know, there may be a prize for the most creative one.

And, in no particular order, the terrorist alert terms are:

1. (Insert country of your choice here) is feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and has raised its security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” Terrorists have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to a “Bloody Nuisance.”

2. Also, the (insert country of your choice here) government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels there are “Surrender” and “Collaborate.” 

3. (Insert country of your choice here) has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

4. (Insert country of your choice here) has also increased its alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbor” and “Lose.”

5. (Insert country of your choice here), on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is a NATO pull out.

6. (Insert country of your choice here) is excited to see its new submarine fleet ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new navy can get a really good look at the old navy.

-Shawna McAlearney